Friday, January 22, 2010

Our Ceremony Venue: Second Thoughts & Second Looks

After Stephen and I decided to marry in the Catholic Church, it only made sense that we should begin our search at the church I attended as a child, which, by chance, had also undergone a beautiful remodeling. When we got the OK from the church’s clergy, we were thrilled. But in the months that followed, that thrill quickly gave way to pure and utter frustration with both the church’s clergy and staff.

Why? Well, our priest is relatively new, and for a while seemed to either not know the answers to our questions, or to want to do everything painstakingly by the book, such as pressuring us to have a full mass. Plus, no one seemed to fully grasp that we live on the opposite side of the country, and therefore don’t have the flexible meeting schedule the church is used to.

Also, while a Catholic wedding is relatively important to Stephen, he knew that I would also be happy with a beautiful outdoor ceremony that didn't include the Catholic religious aspects. I felt upset when I learned that the church won’t allow an aisle runner, and won’t allow scattered flower petals. What, I started to wonder, would this church allow?! For a while, we were ready to walk away from this venue entirely.

But after a couple fantastic meetings over the holidays, I’m happy to say that things have turned around, and we’re feeling tremendously better about the situation. Maybe it was the holiday cheer in the air, but when I met with him in December, the priest didn’t so much as bat an eyelash when I brought up the non-mass. Plus, he happily accepted our addition of an Irish wedding blessing, and didn’t even flinch when I suggested a non-traditional processional tune from The Sound of Music.

And when I walked about the church, going up to the altar and scoping out details, it really hit me. In just five months, I’m going to get married in that church! I’m going to walk down that very aisle to the altar, where Stephen and I will become husband and wife. I realized that my past frustration had caused me to overlook all of the positives about this location – the lovely marble flooring, the sunlight streaming beautifully through the stained glass windows, and the kindness and thoughtfulness of our rehearsal director.

I left feeling relived and happy, plus more excited than ever. Where are you having your ceremony? Have you ever had second thoughts about your choice?

(Photo Credits: Heather Warren & Saint Paschal Baylon Church)


  1. Oh, I'm so happy it worked out well for you both! 5 months.....YAY! =)

  2. 5 months goes so quickly!

    if it makes you feel any better, most churches have restrictions like yours. :)

  3. I have second thoughts about everything almost! So can totally relate! I'm glad that you things worked out for you though and you are excited about your ceremony location

  4. Very Married is is going to FLY by. It looks just beautiful from the photos!

    I haven't had a chance to second guess our venue. We haven't actually seen it yet. ;)

  5. The church looks beautiful! I'm glad you are feeling better about it and focusing on all the positives. I agree with chocolate lover - I second guess everything!

  6. So happy it worked out for you!! We actually ended up switching churches because the first was very mean and rude to us.

    I'm so glad they were able to work with you -- it makes everything so much better.